Wednesday, 17 November 2010


Eight years ago now. This story had already begun. I was concerned by Mum's vulnerability, but I had no idea... no idea....


LSL said...

This is striking for so many reasons. It's really something to see your Mom smiling and moving and so at home in her body after seeing pictures of her for so long. Nice to see your feet and hand and wave in the mirror, too. I don't know why, Greg, but I just kept thinking: You are a good son. You are a good son. You are a good son.

Greg said...

I wasn't sure about posting this, whether maybe I should leave the news of Mum's death as the final entry for the blog.

I made this movie when Mum moved into her retirement apartment back in 2002, so that my Nieces could see the place and my Brother-in-law could understand the route to the development.

I've placed it here on a gut feeling - seeking to remember Mum in life rather than in death.

citygirl said...

Thank you for posting this video Greg. It is nice to see your mom in motion/on video. I often thought about making my mom's passing my last entry too but didn't. The journey doesn't end when they pass...

She said...

Thank you Greg, this is the way to remember your mum...

accidental carer said...

Hold onto this is the coming weeks and months Greg. You verbalise your emotions so very very well and if you can continue to do that we can continue to watch out for you. Take care x

Matt said...

This is beautiful in the way you are remembering her, not at the end of her life but IN her life. Very nice to see her, and you.

I agree with citygirl. This isn't the end. A change, but not an end. I do wish I had videos of my parents, but they're both still a part of me, so there's always that.

karen said...

I am so sorry for your lose. You have been a great son. I loved watching the video. Thanks for sharing. I need to look at some of ours with mom in them. I have forgotten what she used to be like. I hope you have a Merry Christmas .

Lily said...

Thinking of you and hoping your Christmas is full of happy memories and exciting plans for the future. I hope this post wasn't your 'final' one - I shall be checking up on you! x x x

Greg said...

Merry Christmas to you, too, Karen and Lily.

Thanks for wanting more, but this blog was always intended to be a record of Mum's dementia and my efforts to cope with her needs. I could, of course, have posted about how well her funeral went, how Christmas shopping has been full of sad reminders this year, or about how my Sister is threatening to dispute Mum's Will.... but these topics wouldn't be about Mum really - they'd be about me.

I'm thinking of taking the 3 poems I wrote about Mum's dementia and seeing if I can use the material I have collected in "Wits' End" to write some 30 or so more - it might take me a while. If I do decide to publish, then I'll post something about it here. Otherwise, this will (I think) be my final entry.

Thanks for reading

And for writing back!

G xxx

karen said...

Miss you.

Lily said...

Miss you too. Have just watched the video for the first time on my new laptop - wouldn't play on my old computer. Lovely film, well done x x

ChickPea said...

Thank you for sharing all these things, Greg - you are a remarkable man. You have proven yourself a considerate carer, and you have been the best son your Mother could have ever, EVER hoped for. Your generosity assisted and accompanied her thru her final difficult years. Your words have reached out to so very many people, echoing experience, touching difficult and challenging moments.... Thank you.
And now - Be gentle with yourself. Be as kind with yourself as you were ever able to be for your Mum. It takes so much time and energy to move thru the first months. You are now more than halfway thru your first year after your Mum's passing. I hope your path is getting less demanding, and is already holding better times than had become 'norm' for you. I pray that these next chapters of your life hold Light, Love and Laughter in overwhelming abundance. x

Caring Homes - Peter said...

A very touching film. It's nice to have some lasting memories of relatives :)

Greg said...

Thank you, Peter.

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